Abish, Whose Friend Was God

Alma 19

Alma 19:29 And it came to pass that she went and took the queen by the hand, that perhaps she might raise her from the ground; and as soon as she touched her hand she arose.

Do you remember Ammon and the king? Well, that was a happy story, but it isn’t over yet. This story is just beginning, and things are about to get crazy. Like tons-of-people-fainting-on-top-of-each-other crazy.

If you remember, when Ammon taught the king about God, the king felt God in his heart and was astonished. And so he keeled over backwards onto the floor where he slept for two whole days. When he woke up, he tried to tell everyone about the amazing things he had dreamed or had seen, or had felt, or whatever it was that had happened to him while he was sleeping.

“I have dreamed a dream,” said the king, “except it wasn’t like a dream. It was more like seeing with my eyes shut. And God was there, just under my eyes. And God was good. He is like every good thing you could ever imagine. Like flowers, and popcorn, and hugs, and friends, and family dinners, and fresh laundry, and morning showers. All the best and most lovely things you can think of. And he is coming.” And the king felt God all over again, and was astonished all over again, and fell down to the floor all over again. Only this time, so did everybody else. The queen fell down, and the servants fell down, and even Ammon fell down.

And this might seem a bit strange to you because you have probably never been so astonished that you passed out cold on the floor and then didn’t wake up for days and days. But that’s the way it goes with God sometimes. Sometimes feeling God is like feeling a sunrise — dark at first, and climbing so slowly over the mountains that you hardly notice until suddenly, there God is, with you. But feeling God can also be like jumping into a high mountain lake. It is so crisp, and sudden, and cold that you can barely breathe.

And that’s what it was like for these Lamanites. God washed over them all at once like cool, clean, freshly melted snow. And so they all fell over in astonishment. All except for one. Her name was Abish.

Abish was the queen’s servant, and she was a Lamanite. But while all the other servants were feeling God for the first time ever, Abish already knew about God. And because God was her old friend, he was familiar and comfortable. So while everyone else had jumped into a freezing lake of God’s grandeur, she was quietly basking in his light.

But how did a young Lamanite come to know God already? Well, this was because of “a remarkable vision of her father.” What does that mean exactly? We don’t really know. Perhaps it means that her father had a vision, but it could just as easily mean that she had a vision of her father. Maybe her father died and left Abish feeling lonely and small and scared because she missed him and because she was now just a little, fatherless girl in a big powerful world. And one night when she was particularly lonely, she started telling the stars all about her grief, and to her surprise the stars talked back. Only it wasn’t the stars at all. It was her father. He had come to her in a vision.

“Abish, my girl, how I have missed you too,” he would say. And then they would hug and cry and smile and catch up. She would tell him about her school, and hobbies, and friends, and family. And he would tell her about all the stuff that happens after death.

“There is someone called God,” he would tell her. “You may not know God, but God knows you. God is our Heavenly Father, and he is in your heart. And God is our Heavenly Mother, and she is reaching out to lift you up. They miss you, and they are happy when you talk with them. And you can talk to them like you are talking to me. And if you get to know them, he will heal your heart, she will give you peace, they will make you strong. And because of them, we will live together again and never be alone.”

And that would have made Abish so happy and hopeful that she probably set out that very night to get to know God. And over the years, God and Abish grew older and closer and friendlier and more comfortable. This was not always easy for Abish because a lot of Lamanites mocked and killed Nephites for believing in God. What would they do if they knew Abish was a believer? And more than a believer, she was a friend of God.

And so to protect her life, Abish kept God a secret. And it is not easy to keep a secret as big and beautiful as God. But that is exactly what Abish did for years and years and years, waiting for the right time to tell the world what she knew.

But always, God was with her. God was with Abish in the morning when she combed the queen’s hair. God was with her in the evening as she folded the queen’s clothes. Abish carried God in her heart all around the palace, from place to place to place to place. And sometimes she was scared that she would never be able to tell another soul about her big, wonderful, heavy secret.

But when Abish saw everyone falling over in astonishment, her heart pounded and her feet tapped and her toes curled up. And God whispered to Abish “This is it! This is the moment you prayed for. Now run! Spread my name like wildfire!” And Abish ran.

And she knocked on all the doors and shouted in the streets “Come! Come now and see what has happened!” And the people followed Abish back to the palace. Back to the room where everyone had fallen down.

But when all the people arrived, there was a problem. The people did not realize that God was with the sleepers. They did not even realize that the sleepers were sleeping. The people just thought the sleepers were dead. And they wanted to know who had killed everyone.

And who do you think they blamed? They blamed Ammon. Because Ammon was a Nephite and the Lamanites did not like Nephites. The Lamanites had grown up fighting the Nephites. They had even killed some of the Nephites. And so they figured Ammon had come around and pretended to love the king and serve the king until he could find an opportunity to kill the king. But that was not enough revenge for Ammon. He had killed the king and his family and his friends too. And once his vile plan was done, he had killed himself so that no one could punish him for his terrible crime. This was the final, awful step in his secret, evil plan.

The Lamanites hit their chests and stomped their feet and shouted that they never should have been so foolish as to trust a Nephite. “Ammon’s plan was sneaky indeed!” they cried. “He was a clever spy. He was a wicked assassin. But we should have seen it coming. A Nephite cannot love a Lamanite!” And the people decided that even though Ammon was already dead, they would take his body and kill him anyway.

And Abish began to cry. No one understood what was happening. They were all jumping to conclusions. And their conclusions were wrong. So very wrong. If only they could know how wrong they were. The sleepers were not dead. And Ammon had not killed anyone. Ammon loved the king. A Nephite can love a Lamanite.

Abish had thought everyone would see with their eyes and understand with their hearts. God had come here to this palace, here to their king, here to their queen. Abish thought the people would understand because God was already in their hearts. But something had gone horribly wrong. And the people saw with their eyes but understood with their preconceptions. And instead of seeing a real miracle, they saw an imaginary tragedy.

And so Abish ran to the sleeping queen, and took her by the hand and said, “Arise.” And the queen rose up and stood tall and strong and praised God. And then the king woke up, and he stood and praised God. And then the servants woke up, and Ammon woke up, and they all stood and praised God. And all the Lamanites could see how wrong they had been. The sleepers were not dead. They had never been more alive.

And the Lamanites watching began to feel something inside of them. It wasn’t quite like jumping into a freezing mountain lake, but something was different. Their hearts were growing. Or perhaps they were realizing that there was more in their hearts than they knew. God was there. Like the morning sun rising over the cold mountains, God was there already.

And things began to change very quickly for these Lamanites. People throughout the land started talking with Ammon and his brothers. The king and his family were baptized, and then the king’s father and his family. And then the king’s people. And a lot of Lamanites went from being bad to good, from killing to saving, from fighting to loving. They loved each other, and they loved Ammon, the Nephite.

And the people realized that money, and land, and titles, and even their sins didn’t matter so much. They would give all those things up. They would bury them deep in the ground and walk away just for a chance to know God better. And you should know that they meant it. And that someday, they would do just that.

But that is another story. So for now, we will end on this image: the people have come to be baptized. They have gathered at a lake, in the mountains. It is a large lake, and there is room for everyone. One by one, they fall backward into the water which washes over them sudden, cold, and clean. And one by one, Abish reaches out and takes them by the hand to help them up into the sunshine. And they arise.

Joshua is an award-winning writer and director. His recent book, Ali the Iraqi, was published by BCC press. Sarah is a literature and theology doctoral student studying the Book of Job in the twentieth century.

Artwork by Maddie Baker.